Said it? Then fix it!

In many relationships there is always that one person who has a habit of saying the wrong thing. The “What Comes up Comes Out” person. We know them. They talk about people, like ain’t nothing wrong with them! Trust me. I have seen my share. So have you. I recall one brother talked about everybody, but nobody knew that he was using aluminum foil, covering up his top row of missing teeth. You feel me!

Why is it always that same uncouth person that comes out of their face and says something that they must apologize for later, but have a “pride” problem in apologizing?

You need to really weigh what you say— before you say it. You can say the wrong thing that can cause damage your loose mouth cannot begin to repair. Your motto should be, “If I am not bad enough to apologize— I am not bad enough to say it.”

What is the real problem? Is it because you have no dominance or ruler ship elsewhere, so you choose to use your life line of oxygen to utter words, to say something hurtful? Perhaps you have some sort of anger management issue you need to handle. You actually build a relationship, by which you choose to construct harmful words, just to tear it down?

Pride is the reason you are uncouth, stubbornness is the reason you will not apologize.

It is always the mouthy profile type who procrastinates in the decision to say they are sorry, and most often when they do decide to apologize, they have to share the blame. That is called “equal blame.” That is a crock and you know it!

Some of are really strategic with their stalled, “equal blame” apology. It starts out with a discussion. You are thinking an apology is coming….. (…wait for it….)…..  Then they tell you it was something YOU said that caused them to say something out of line. Do not fall for it! Listen to that punk talk, do not take the bait, don’t say anything and see how the discussion ends. The minute you respond, you lose grounds for an apology. It is a shame you have to be strategic, but you are dealing with an uncouth strategist.

Why can’t big mouth people, either shut up, put up and fix up what they have said?

The partner with finesse and good communication skills is smooth, polished, a good communicator, take ownership of what they say, and definitely understands the power of words. That person knows that the power of words in an untrained mouth is a verbal volatile combination. They understand so much so; that they use their words to build relationships, opposed to the uncouth who tears their relationships down. The finesse recognizes that words are very difficult to retract.

The only thing I can say to those partners who open their mouths purposely and with painful intent; make sure you keep good hygiene, fresh breath, keep your dick hard, ensure you are very attractive, no hair loss, no big nose, your punani stays wet, you are not a one minute man, no missing teeth, no raggedy teeth, (no buck teeth either).  Make sure you have no annoying habits, like sucking your tongue, or sucking your teeth, no pot belly, and no other disgusting and annoying habits your partner puts up with and love you in spite of yourself!

If you are the one who is uncouth, keep in mind that a back handed remark just may be a verbal maim to your flaw(s).  If you can take it, then be prepared, because you are asking for it.  And that back handed remark, directed to you, just may be your verbal downfall.

Said it! Fix it!

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About dontdestroyrelationship

I am passionate about Relationships. To be in a Relationship you need skills. Some of the best skills to have are: a creative perspective, strategy in developing a win-win for both sides, be able to speak and receive honest communication, stay persistent, yet calm in conflict, some negotiation skills, and humor. These skills and more you need--- without emotion. If you have logic as the primary and emotion as secondary, there is nothing you cannot overcome in a relationship. I tell you how you bring destroyers into your relationship. Join me! It is a fascinating and revealing journey.
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2 Responses to Said it? Then fix it!

  1. Liz Willis says:

    OH NOW!!!! Here! We! Go! Wow! Natalie! Well! Stated! Explicitly! Expounded!

    Once again this Urban Diva never ceases to amaze! The power of the tongue, is a mighty tool which can definetly dissipate a meaningful relationship! We have one tongue and two ears. Which is to admonish us to listen twice as much as we speak! The tongue is like a sharp knife, kills without drawing blood.

    Another fantastical perusal!!
    Merci Beaucoup!

  2. Randall says:

    Sis you are funny but very truthful. A lot of people don’t think before they speak. Im trying to do better. But I don’t use foil, don’t have a pot belly any longer ,my Dentist know my name, I chew gum but I am bolding lol ..
    ill buy your book when you write it.

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