Emotional destroyers are prevalent in everything we do, feel, say, think, believe, react to, and interact with. We all have them. Some of us are more predisposed to the negative angle of certain emotions than others. This depends primarily on culture, behaviors we were exposed to growing up, and the emotions we felt the most, when someone we loved has hurt us.
Some of the emotional destroyers are: selfishness, anger, pride, stubbornness, resentment, jealously, greed, insecurity, and low self-esteem, lack of self-confidence, and entitlement.
Each of us has our own emotions we must deal with in order to maintain the emotional balance in our lives. We must manage them. If we don’t, we are controlled by them. For example, your display of anger in the house will be different from your display on the job. Your anger is not removed on the job, it simply does not have a place there, and the consequences of your anger are greater, than if you go home and beat the dog in anger.
Either you are working life or life is working you. The same applies to your emotions. Either you are working your emotions, or they are working you.
If you are always yelling, crying, hurting, screaming, complaining, always feeling desponded, and have the illusionary superior need to make someone feel inferior to you: your emotions are working you. If you need to have someone validate you all of the time. Your emotions are working you. If you find you are mostly confused, and cannot make a decision most of the time— your emotions are working you.
Understanding how your emotions work and the impact they play in your life is critical. If you accomplish this, you will be able to identify your trouble spots— as well as recognize them in others.
There is a saying, “To know the universe is to know thyself.”
We can interpret this to mean that the emotional needs we have, we can identify in someone else, because we know what it looks like and we can relate to it. This also applies to a characteristic we need: like strength, for example. We can identify it in someone else, even if we are deficient in it, because we recognize the need for strength in our weakness.
When you understand the workings of emotional destruction, your understanding will manifest into a revelation to either strengthen, or channel your emotion. If you are not strengthening the emotional weakness you have, or if you are not channeling, your emotion is working you. Therefore, you lack emotional control.
A good example of this is stress. Stress has the ability to cause sickness and depression, as well as make you a very difficult person to be with. The post called, “Stress Stresses Creativity” explains how to channel stress, which allows you to work stress, rather than stress working you!
When you are able to understand the many ways in which emotions work against us, you will be able to determine how the combination of you and your partner’s emotion are working together; or if it is not working.
With this knowledge you both can become stronger by working together, to stay together.