Does it feel as though you and your partner are room mates? It does not matter if you live together or not, do you lack that closeness and intimacy? Have you not sexed each other or kissed for weeks? Okay…months??? What!!! Are you guys the “Couple Ho-Hum”? Hell no!!!! Tell me it isn’t so!!!!
Honestly? No intimacy? No relationship. It is just that simple.
You need a fire! Let’s start off with a little heat, first.
Most of us would never really go hard, and just grab our partner and act as though we have not seen a man or woman for years! That type of sexual starvation would have us mindless and driving us without any fears or inhibitions! Hey! May I suggest you go for that? Nothing is better than just taking your partner and sexing her/him as if you are by yourself and your partner is the victim! Whew! Is it hot in here or just me!
Bring back the intimacy by eyeing and touching your partner whenever and however you can. Not groping, but touching in a way that is alluring and sexy. For example, when sitting on the couch together, you can sit at opposite ends and have a conversation, while your eyes are slowly eating up your partner as you gaze at her/him from head to toe. Or sit close and put your arm around them while reading or watching television.
Clean the kitchen together and use that time to get closer like rubbing up slightly against them (be sexy about this — do not bump your partner!) while going into a cabinet. Or if you need to move him/her, take them by the waist, say “excuse me.” Let your touch speak for you.
The bathroom should never be off quarters to a couple, just because one of you is in there. That is the time to touch and kiss the back of his/her neck, find a place to sit, while someone is on the toilet, or hop in the shower with them— even if you get out before they do. You are creating moments of touching and establishing closeness.
When your partner is reading, lean over, just close enough, as if you are flirting with your presence. Ask about the book. Look them in the eye as they explain it to you. Take the book, lay your head on their lap and bring them in close for a kiss.
Ask him/her if they want to have a cocktail with you, or offer to make their favorite beverage.
Greet your partner at the door with a kiss, and their favorite dessert.
Go to sleep holding each other.
Find opportunities that create a moment of intimacy everyday. Have fun with this. You can only win in doing so. Being sexy does not have its moments. Sexy is everyday! Do not cheat yourself of this fantastic characteristic by being shy and uncertain. When you are uncertain, you are not sexy. Sexiness is confidence. That confidence comes with your self growth, sexual knowledge, technique and style of who you are, and your work results in your being sexy. This is where the sexual aura comes from.
Bring back the kiss. It is something extremely sexy and intimate about a great kiss. Only 10% of the human population do not engage in a kiss. If you are kissing your partner, regularly, you cannot lose that fire! “Our lips and tongues are packed with nerve endings, which help intensify all those dizzying sensations of being in love when we press our mouths to someone else’s. Experiencing such feelings doesn’t usually make us think too hard about why we kiss – instead, it drives us to find ways to do it more often.” http://scienceline.org/2006/10/ask-fiore-kiss/
You are building your sensual profile, while rekindling your relationship, and incorporating ways of being sexy. Do something intimate everyday and you will find that sexiness will become a part of who you are.
The goal is to establish the intimacy to having regular sexcapades with your partner!
mannn, I so feel this post, I tried this, failed, but I’m with you
Hey there my Friend! Nothing beats a failure but a try. Sometimes when you have done all you can? Sometimes you just gotta let go. It takes two to make the relationship work. One can only carry it so far. Sometimes, you just gotta let go: https://dontdestroyrelationship.wordpress.com/2013/02/26/sometimes-you-gotta-let-go/
This was phenominal! There is a huge difference between sexing and intimacy. You were precise in elucidating the difference! Kissing causes great intimacy with your partner! Never close your lips to those whom you have already opened your heart.
Pingback: You Need a Fire! (Part 3) | The Relationship Destroyers