His/Her Past vs His/Her Present

The Past. The Present. The Future. Three powerful times in space that work throughout the course of every life, but never at the same time. The protocol, between these three forces, is never to overlap or reside in the time of the other.

Negative emotional baggage holds no protocol to time and space, but will travel from the past into the present and vice versa. A relationship gone bad will actually parlay between the past, present and future, because it was never reconciled as the end, in the time in which it occurred.

It is a saying, “The way to get over someone is to get under someone”. The getting under gets you laid and the sex may be spectacular! (Who does not love sex!) But you will be on your back for the rest of your relationships. Handicapped, broken, and emotionally damaged from the baggage you have carried, because you have not given yourself time to mourn and purge through the hurtful experience of a relationship ended.

You are now in a new relationship. Regardless of how much your His/Her Present Partner loves you, you are blinded by the painful deeds of your His/Her Past Partner. You cannot see the beauty of love because you are incapable of seeing the present void of the past. This means His/Her Present have no future in your life, because you entered the relationship as damaged goods.

The destroyer of the relationship is your His/Her Past living in the moments of your His/Her Present.

I was a “Charmed” sitcom fan. Sometimes the Sisters had to time travel between the Past and Future. In order to return to the Present, the Sisters would chant, “A time for everything. And for everything its place. Return what has been moved, through time and space.”

Whether traveling through time is possible or not, the chant bears some relevance to the topic here. The Charmed sisters were careful, when they travelled through time, to respect the protocols of the three Time Forces. They would not carry anything into their present time, for in doing so, an imbalance would occur in the present, and would wreak havoc to their very existence.

The message is, leave the past in the past. Or the consequence of carrying the past with you, will be counterproductive to your existence.

“Mind Magic”, a book written by Bill Harvey, expounds on how the mind is shaped, beginning at childhood, and molded through surrounding people and situations in life. The mind creates pre-sets because it needs a precedent of an image, action, item, etc in order to relate to the present. For example, when we think of a ball, the pre-set is to think of the ball as being round–not square. Throughout his book, Mr. Harvey provides different perspectives on the pre-sets in order to reshape the mind, thus reshaping the thought process.

Work to reshape the pre-sets of pain and explore the power behind the pain. Try to accept, process, and reconcile the pain by working to understand why the past ended as it did. Learn from that, and leave it in the past. Then move forward. Sometimes we move on, but we do not move forward. For every pain, comes a payback of goodness. This is the balance of the Universe. And that payback of goodness could very well reside in your His/Her Present.

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About dontdestroyrelationship

I am passionate about Relationships. To be in a Relationship you need skills. Some of the best skills to have are: a creative perspective, strategy in developing a win-win for both sides, be able to speak and receive honest communication, stay persistent, yet calm in conflict, some negotiation skills, and humor. These skills and more you need--- without emotion. If you have logic as the primary and emotion as secondary, there is nothing you cannot overcome in a relationship. I tell you how you bring destroyers into your relationship. Join me! It is a fascinating and revealing journey.
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